These last few days have been ridiculously hot. I absolutely HATE the hot weather. If there was one other thing which placed me in PMS mode other than the monthy thing, it would be being stuck in a day with the blazing sun.

I wished I wasn't born in Singapore. I'm having a throbbing headache, thanks to the SUN. Seriously, the sweltering heat is driving me crazy. I can't even look out at my window for a minute; the sunlight is too strong and too glaring. Forks seem like a nice place to live. Small, cooling, and there's not much sun.

Lately I've been thinking alot, creating more theories to humor myself. Of course, these theories normally popped out randomly. And by the time I think about them again, I can't seem to remember how I got these theories.

I've never been a occasions type of person. For instance, I don't see why I should be all excited and cheerful to be celebrating my own birthday, or to be trapped in festives like CNY where it's full of people. Full of headache inducing unnecessary noise. Maybe this part of my personality explains why I'm not much of a people person. I didn't like mixing around with loud crowds; I hardly fit in there. Of course, sometimes it gets unbearably lonely. These kind of times allows my imagination to run wild. Sometimes, I think it's a good thing, but it depends if I can control it. If I can't control the consequences of my wild imagination, it would just imprint judgemental opinions on people. On my friends. It's hard sometimes, and it bothers me. Realising the truth, and creating a 'truth'.

I noticed over these 3 days that I was changing. I'm definately changing. I don't know in what sense or way, but I don't seem to think the same way as before. For me, thinking if a very important aspect of myself. What I think creates what I am. That's why I have to be careful of my thoughts and my perspectives. Some things shouldn't be thought about, because I know that it would change things. Well, for me at least. Change how I looked at it, how I feel about it, and sometimes even trigger a reaction for it. I might be blowing up over something that happened 6 months ago. Goo should know about this.

I wonder, is it just me, or is everyone else like this? I think, and the thoughts create my perspective, my feelings, and my reactions. It's common for people to think, but is it normal, or even good to let such personal thoughts affect reality? Mixing virtual with reality. Maybe, I'd been thinking too much. Perhaps, life is that simple, after all. Not like how I imagined.

Maybe, I would be better off if I changed.